March 9, 2015

Results & Getting My Sh*t Together

I have started this post at least 7 times. There’s so much that I want to say, but it’s all stuck tumbling around in my head and turns to mush when I try to type it out.

In my last road to wellness update, I mentioned that my Naturopath had 2 theories on why my body won’t regulate itself. 1. Not following my plan 100% during the holidays and 2. focusing on gut and liver health rather than hormonal health.

She was right and wrong all at the same time.

I got the results from my saliva test back {I was tested for my hormone and adrenal levels} and they are bad.

My cortisol levels are so low that my doctor even commented on how she is amazed that I always feel good, because at my levels I should be lethargic and tired all the time!

My progesterone levels are so low that I’m barely still in the “pre-menopausal” stage.

Those are just the major ones…I’m basically a mess inside.

To say this is depressing doesn’t even touch on how I feel.

I’m sad that I have spent the past few years trying to make this better and it just seems to get worse.

I’m mad that it took me going from doctor to doctor to FINALLY have one diagnose me with PCOS years ago. Why did it take so long? I was in my late 20’s before a doctor did something as simple as LOOK AT MY BLOOD TESTS and compare different results. Something other doctors could have done. Shit…if I had all those results and knew Dr. Google back then, I could have figured it out.

Most of all, I am PISSED. At myself. I spend months at a time doing the right thing. Doing what I need to do to get my health in check. It’s happened many times. Just within the 3.5 years I’ve been blogging, you can tell when I am doing what’s right because I put that shit ALL OVER here and social media.

Then I stop. Not because I’m too busy, but because I just stop. This is a trend that I’ve been fighting all my life.

When it comes to work, I will give 125% to any project I am given. So why do I only give 70% to taking care of myself??

I’m eating right, working out, feeling good, looking good and then it all stops. I start letting gluten back into my diet. I justify only working out twice a week. I tell myself that my small jeans do fit, yet the muffin top coming out from the top should tell me otherwise.

This is something I have known about myself for years. I guess admitting it publicly is the first step to taking back that control and putting myself first.

The second step is to figure out HOW that change is going to happen.  I have a plan I am working on and will share that next week.

Because there will be a change. I’m damn sure of that!

Let’s Chat
Leave me your favorite “get out there and do it” quote or phrase.

Organically Mo

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  1. I pray things continue to get better for you and that you feel better. Keep positive and keep living! Have a wonderful week.
    Ivanna recently posted…How We Paid Off $32,000 in Debt in Under 3 Months & Losing Debt FastMy Profile

  2. Hugs! That sounds frustrating! Try to stay positive and take care of yourself!
    Betsy recently posted…How To Carry Water On A RunMy Profile

  3. It’s definitely easy to slip when it comes to ourselves. I find it so much easier to give my all to other people/projects/etc and let it slide when it comes to ME. Which obviously isn’t a good thing- and it’s definitely something we all need to work on for sure!
    AJ @ NutriFitMama recently posted…Healthy Eating in Nashville- SaladWorks + $25 Giveaway!My Profile

    • OrganicallyMo says:

      I’m so glad that other people relate to how I’m feeling. I definitely need to make myself a priority!

  4. I’ve definitely gone through phases where I start to justify slacking or not-so-good habits. Sometimes it takes a day of feeling really miserable to snap myself out of it. I keep a list in my phone of all the good things that come from eating right and working out and all the bad things I feel inside when I don’t do those things. When I feel like throwing in the towel, I look at that list to remind myself that I’ll feel better if I stick with it. It’s a good little kick in the butt.
    Nicole @ Fitful Focus recently posted…St. Patty’s Thin Mint Pudding {vegan, gf}My Profile

  5. “Ever tried ever failed, no matter. Try again, fail again, fail better”
    -Samuel Beckett
    Margo recently posted…What Did We Learn This Month? @Shape_Magazine with Kate Hudson on the Cover @fableticsMy Profile

  6. Believe me I know how frustrating and annoying it can be when doctors take so darned long to run the right tests to get to the bottom of things… I am waiting 3 years now and still have no answer. Enough about me, this is your post! I hope you continue to LOOK AFTER YOURSELF BETTER! 🙂
    Elle recently posted…Happy International Women’s Day #IWDMy Profile

  7. Just do it. Every. Damn. Day.

    I feel you with getting complacent, I feel like I go through that cycle every week. It is hard to maintain healthy living momentum over time, but it is worth the struggle. Sometimes I feel like losing the baby weight is stupid because eventually I’m just going to put it back on when I have another baby, BUT I know I want to get back to a healthy weight first and (hopefully!) enjoy it for awhile too! It’s hard but having a plan to work is key.
    Kate @KateMovingForward recently posted…5 Pieces of Encouragement and Motivation for Your MondayMy Profile

  8. I feel you on the frustration with docs. I’ve got those battles as well. I agree with you seeing your patterns and acknowledging them is powerful and the first step toward changing them. Hugs to you.
    Marcia recently posted…You Look Like a SwimmerMy Profile

  9. I think all of us go through phases where we let excuses come in the door and it’s ok! Recognizing it is key and you are doing that! I go in cycles as well. I’m sorry about the medical issues, I know how frustrating that can be. I’m in the medical field and get so frustrated sometimes!!
    Sue @ This Mama Runs for Cupcakes recently posted…Paris Marathon Training Recap: Week 8My Profile

  10. Sorry to hear about all of this. I can only imagine how frustrated you’re feeling. Just remember that things will get better. 🙂
    Kathryn @ Dancing to Running recently posted…Shamrock Half Marathon Training Log – Week 16My Profile

  11. RAH! So frustrating about the doctor. And will definitely pray you get your mojo back. I do the same. Sometimes I wonder if I haven’t really found the RIGHT motivation when I try to do well (in foot/exercise/etc) and then fall off the wagon. As if I can last for a time on being excited to share and post about it but then really life hits hard and I just poop out instead of sticking to it. Other times I think set back seasons are just part of life and I need to cut myself some slack, find a better balance in it all so I don’t go swinging so far one minute and then swing the other way the next. So, no answers or ideas from me. Sorry. I tell myself that today is a new day, another chance to eat and exercise right, and to forget whatever I did or didn’t do yesterday, not let it make me feel bad.
    Running Hutch recently posted…The Unsweetened LifeMy Profile

  12. I am very guilty of letting go of what I know I need to be doing. I tend to get so wrapped up in it that I end up burning myself out. I hope things take a turn for the better for you soon.
    stephanie recently posted…Mayhem Monday: Hints of SpringMy Profile

  13. Nike had it right with Just Do It. It can be so easy to give ourselves excuses. Don’t give up!
    jill conyers recently posted…5 People You Most Want To Workout WithMy Profile

  14. I really want to get a hormone test done myself. I asked my doctor at my last physical because I said I thought my cortisol or something must be off because I can’t lose weight even with eating healthy and exercising daily. She basically brushed me off and said I should be happy with my body and not worry about weight. I was like ok??? I need to go somewhere else and see if I can get a hormone test done because I really do feel like something is off inside me. I hope you start feeling better soon!
    Patty @ Reach Your Peak recently posted…Compression Socks vs. Sleeves + Tiux Compression Socks ReviewMy Profile

  15. Hugs. Sweet thing. I know all to well how you feel. You can do this… and sharing your goal makes it all the more real. 🙂
    Rachel recently posted…Counting Down to Boston and the Training PlanMy Profile

  16. You will get back on track! We all get in a rut sometimes especially this time of year. I always find that I feel the worst about myself just before spring arrives and my motivation can be super low. Perhaps the change in number of daylight hours as spring approaches will help a little? Hugs!
    Sandra Laflamme recently posted…What is Clean Eating?My Profile

  17. So sorry you are having to deal with all this.
    It is so hard, I know I personally do great for a while, then the excuses start sliding in. I hope we can both get back on track.
    I’ll be thinking of you.
    Abby @ BackAtSquareZero recently posted…Loving Lately – MarchMy Profile

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